Call me normal and I'll call you often

Welcome back to camp, everyone.

(29) Days of August

I'd like to give a special highlight to Sam Stone and Noureen Nanjee for a spectacular 2:00 am ponding last night (this morning?) proving that it is never too late to properly christen a birthday. 

Oh it is good to be back.  Today will be a day of firsts: first Pitzer lunch of the year (get ready Alex Cromidas), first daytime swim in the fountain with Cassie Won, first day seeing my beautiful fellow August birthday holder Danielle Shubat, first time I can hear properly since a last-minute decision to see Deadmau5 with Drake Escrofani, and the first day since I've been here that it does not feel too hot to wear clothing. 

And now it's time that we...

frankly my dear, i don't give a Spam™

Poster: $10 each
Box of thumbtacks: $2
Sitting on my bed and explaining, to my 7 year old neighbor, each of my 11 posters currently hanging in my room: costs me nothing, but still kinda fun.

Best moment: watching her point to the poster of Jimi Hendrix that is next to my Pulp Fiction poster and listening to her ask, "Did he do the pulp fiction after he played guitars?"  #juleswinnfieldlookslikejimihendrix

Next best moment: Teaching her ?-year-old younger(?) brother (I swear, these kids are a year older every other week) how to play Linus and Lucy on our piano.  Sleep with one eye open, kid.

5 good reasons to punch a dolphin in the mouth

1.  When a dolphin makes those cute whistles and clicky sounds, they're actually insulting you and your family in a horribly vulgar manner.
2.  Their rubbery skin is easy on the knuckles.  Makes for a much better undersea punching bag than an octopus, which can tend to leave sucker marks.
3.  Dolphins play their entire lives.  Humans only play until we reach adulthood.  This is unfair.  Make it fair by landing a nice roundhouse kick to the face.
4.  Dolphins think they're so great.  Ever seen them swim with a boat?  They think it's a race.  Put that dolphin in its place with a solid left hook.
5.  Anything that smiles that often needs a good punch every now and then.

Thanks, Oatmeal.

*Disclaimer: This entry is intended for absurd or comedic purposes only.  I do not endorse violence towards dolphins, if for no other reason than that the dolphin will almost certainly take you down.  They wear jellyfish as hats.  These things mean business.*

Burns so good